See Ya Soon!

I've come to hate goodbyes. I just don't think there is any good reason for them. So instead, I say farewell, or see ya soon.

One of my very bestest friends, Katie, is moving to Ohio tomorrow. She's lived here for 10 months. It's crazy to me how God answers prayer through people. She was an answer to a prayer that I had been praying for a while.

For the past month, my life was kinda put on hold, cause I knew Katie would be leaving soon. I wanted to spend as much time with her as I could before they left.

What I couldn't get over was why God would allow this to happen. I didn't want to see her go. I wanted, and still want, her to be here so we can hang out all the time. But that's just not what God has in store for our friendship. While it's sad, I know she is a life-long friend. I know she'll be around when I get married, have kids and then have to go to a nursing home. :) She's the kind of the friend that just gets me.

Anyways, as I was talking to God about all this he asked me a question. He asked me why I was so hung up on the fact that she was leaving. He asked me if I trusted him. He asked me if I thought he knew best. I really didn't respond. I knew the answers to the questions in my mind and in my heart. The fact is, I just wanted things my way for once. But the reality is that life isn't my way. It will NEVER be my way. And I know that's what is best. God's way is the best way.

Many are the plans of a mans heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails. 
Proverbs 19:21 

In everything, I desire that the Lord's purpose prevails. I'm stubborn and I don't always listen at first. But I do want the Lord's purpose. In this, I am so excited for the next part of Katie's journey with her husband and Jesus. I know that this is God's purpose. But she will be missed. 

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.
Proverbs 16:9

It is SO CLICHE

I wanna say that everything is fine.
But I'm just sad. I'm sad and I've just been crying so much.
It's more change.

I'm about to graduate.
One of my very best friends, who I became close with so quickly, is leaving in a mere 9 days.
And I just don't know which direction God is pointing me to.

Like I said...more change.


You'd think it's something I'd be used to by now. But hey, whatever. I'm still not. That's just how life is, or so I hear. Those older and wiser than I, have expressed that life only gets harder. This stuff is easy, cause I'm not having to worry about children, bills and car problems. Blah, blah, blah.

I only hear half of the cliches anymore, because I feel like I've heard them all or said them all about a thousand times. So I'm just done saying them. It doesn't help anyone. Or so it feels.

I know it's not true.

Most likely, I'll just continue to say them and repeat them to myself when I need to hear them. I won't always believe it, but most cliches are true. They come with lots of truth. Although hard to hear, they do bring some comfort. And sometimes, they are just funny to laugh at.

So here are some classics...
"God has something better in store for you"
"You'll be stronger when it's over"
"Everything is gonna work out for the good"
"God's in control, he knows what he's doing"
"You'll learn something through this"


Just remember, God speaks through those cliches sometimes. You just have to be able to hear him. He is with you, my friends. Scripture is the best to leave you with, so here is something that has been an encouragement to me.

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.
1 John 4:16

I Don't Want It To Be Boring...

I'm speaking on 1 John 4 this next Sunday. This is one of my favorite passages in scripture because it talks about how God is love. It's crazy to me how hard it is for me to write this talk. I love this part of scripture, but the more I think about it, the more I don't even know where to begin.

I think that most of my talks center around love. How important it is and how we need to make it a part of our lives. I have this idea about how to convey this message to students, but after a while, it seems like they tune you out. If only because they've heard it a hundred times. They might have, so why talk about it again.

Then I came across this part in a concordance I was reading...In 1 John 4, it opens with the phrase, "dear friends." That phrase is continually used throughout this chapter. I read that the phrase, "dear friends," simply means "beloved."

What a powerful word. According to Merriam-Webster, beloved means "dearly loved, dear to the heart."

When John was writing the chapter, he wants us to know that we are dear to his heart. John doesn't know me. He's in heaven right now, and probably knows I'm talking about him. He and Jesus are pretty tight, I'm sure. But there is no way that he knew that that phrase, "beloved" would be such a heart warming word.

God does not desire for us to be bored by his Word. He wants us to have joy every time we read it. I try so hard to make sure that His Word comes alive for me...every time I read it. Sometimes though, it just doesn't happen.

Today though, I read 1 John 4 in a new way. Instead of "dear friends," I see "beloved."

Remember that you are His Beloved.

Introducing, the Proud Owner of a NEW (previously used) CAR!!!!

God has been teaching me so much.
First of all, I've been ENAMORED with 1 John. I think I've read it like 12 times, and I'm still going! We're learning about it in big church and teaching it in JH and 5th and 6th. It's so amazing. If you get a chance, read 1 John. It's one of those books where new things jump out at you all the time.
I've been learning about letting things go.
Most of the time, there are things that we think about and worry over that just don't matter. One of the questions I ask myself is, "does it matter?" If it doesn't, I give it to God and don't think about it. God is in control. He is the one and only person that I trust fully, who will never let me down. Ever. This may be my life on earth, but I'm simply a pawn in His story.
I've been growing up. I bought my first car yesterday. I own it. I have to go get it in my name, but it's still mine. Then I got my own insurance for it. I am now a proud owner of a 2000 Kia Spectra GSX. It's truly an experience. I haven't felt like this much of an adult, ever. And I'm about to graduate!!!!!!
I can't comprehend the way God times things, but he does it in such a way that amazes me, every single time.
Thank you, Father.
You are so good.
"always faithful//always good" - Gungor

To Him

My hearts stops in the nearness of you.
Your love is unconditional.
Every breath is difficult without you.
The road of life feels burdensome, unless you are holding my hand.
I can't understand every path, or road block we come to.
It doesn't make sense that you are still with me when I've left you behind so many times.
And yet, there you stand, with arms open wide and forgiveness on your lips.
Why are you love?
Why does your grace know no bounds?
I am not worthy.
But you have called me your own.
You knew my name before the earth began.
You will be by my side always and forever.
Jesus, I am yours.

Thailand...Here I Come!

Welp, there ya have it. I'm going to Thailand. The trip will be January 17th-26th. I'm going with my church, The Grove. I'm so stinkin excited about it!!!! Here is the letter that I wrote to raise money.

Dear friends and family,                    

     This is a picture of me in Northern Ireland. I recently got back from a month long mission trip there. God taught me so much and it was such a blessing to be able to serve the people of NI.

One of the things that God revealed to me is that I need to be fighting injustices in America and around the globe. This has been on my heart for a while, but God confirmed it even more while I was in Northern Ireland. Which brings me to the purpose of this letter.

            Because of this passion to fight injustices, God has put it on my heart to go on a mission trip to Thailand. My church, The Grove, is a church that has a core value of serving the world. This will be our first trip to Thailand. We are partnering with a non-profit ministry over there that is dedicated to pulling out girls that are trapped in the sex trafficking ring. This organization reaches out to girls that have no hope that life will ever change.  They give them a way out. I'm hoping that this trip will give me an accurate, heart breaking realization of how these young women and girls live. Earlier this year, God showed me that I have to be mentoring and helping young women, specifically those that have been in the sex trafficking arena. There is a huge need for people to work with these women and show them that they matter.

            The trip is going to be January 17th through the 26th. This will be our first trip, which means we will be seeing how the organization works and helping with anything we can. There is a need for people to be aware of how prevalent sex trafficking is across the world, but also in our own backyard. I believe God is calling me to work with women here in the states, but he wants me to see how ministries work in other countries. I need to raise $2800 to go on this trip for eight days. I am so excited to see how God will move in my heart and spirit through this trip.

            Please seek God in supporting me; whether it is by prayer, financially or with encouraging words. My stay there will be tough and filled with spiritual warfare, because of the spiritual battle that rages there everyday. If you are interested in supporting me, there is an envelope that you can fill out and send to The Grove (2777 S. Gilbert Rd., Chandler, AZ 85286). Thank you for taking time to read this and prayerfully consider supporting me.

            Also, you can follow me on my blog, www.crazybeautiful-agape.blogspot.com, where I will write about my experiences. Please feel free to write me on my Facebook, www.facebook.com/bre.lee1 or via email, Breana.lee15@gmail.com with any questions. I would love to answer any questions you have! If you are interested in finding out more information about sex trafficking visit The Exodus Road, NightLight or Street Light.

                        God bless!

                                    Breana Lee

I intend to send this letter to friends and family that don't know this story. I have a lot of funds to raise in a short amount of time, but God is faithful. He got me to NI and I know he'll get me to Thailand. I'll be posting more about the struggle in deciding to go, how it is stretching me before I leave, and how you can continue to pray for my journey. Thanks for reading!!