He's Moving in Mighty Ways

This week Kristen and I have been in Enniskillen with the local vineyard, The Lakes Vineyard, doing Love Enniskillen. This week is about serving the community in different ways. Every day has been filled with things to serve the community. We've been cleaning toilets, cleaning up people's gardens, cutting grass, washing people's car windows, healing on the streets and treasure hunting. We are not the only American's though. There is a group here of 20 Other American's on the World Race with Adventures in Missions. There is also a couple of locals staying with all plus at the rugby club. At the moment, I'm sitting near a place that has free wifi because I'm feeling rather sick. This is the only access to wifi we have had at all during the week. But boy have I been learning a lot. God is in this place, this city, these people. Yesterday, we had healing on the streets and there was major spiritual warfare. God want this city and the people, but the devil won't hand it over easily. We had some people accuse us of drinking while seeing, which was a blatant lie. We had a lady call a couple of our girls abominations because of wearing jeans an make-up. We had a battle on our hands coming from every direction. At one point, a man stood up that was not associated with your group start preaching fire, and brimstone. It was intense and in your face ad real life. We have had numerous people say no to prayer and yet, the power of God is with us. His presence is tangible, relatable and full of unconditional love. God is simply asking for obedience. We need this week as much as te people we're ministering do. What I have struck by is the community we have built within the group so quickly. There is a common purpose and bond that allows the fluency of our service to be easy. We are united in this and can take down the enemy, no matter what he throws our way. He is for us, not against us. He brings us to the point of trust with Him that is so inviting that we can't resist. He wants our obedience to Him so he can use us and bless us. It is simply amazing to see Him move.

Brain Blast!

Last night, I tried going to bed early. Alas, it did not work. I laid in bed for 2 and a half hours trying to get myself to sleep. My ritual is falling asleep while I pray. I've done this ever since I can remember. It's my time to process the day and just give it to God. As I was trying to do this, I got very angry because I wasn't able to go to sleep. Basically, I ranted about it and yelled at God. That means that today, I am very tired. I've already had two cups of coffee.

Today, Kristen and I are going to Enniskillen. From what I hear, it is a very wet place. Lots of rain! I cannot wait!! It's a week of serving the community, healing on the streets and treasure hunting. I'm super excited about it all. Then after that we're going to stay at a monastery.

Yesterday, I was talking to my friend Rachel :) She was telling me all about her life and what God was doing. She told me that she is going off for 2 months to 24/7 prayer. It sounds so awesome. I loved getting to talk to her after 4 years of not seeing her. We met for the first time when we were put on a team together serving for 2 weeks through Youth for Christ. Before I knew it, 2 and half hours had flown by and still had more to talk about!

One of the things that God spoke to me during that time was working in juvenile rehabilitation. BRAIN BLAST!!! I was so excited!! I haven't thought of this before and it's exactly what I want to do. I'm putting my degree into practice as well as working with youth. It's a great combination!! God gave me that insight and I can't wait to see what it is going to look like. Even if it's not where I will end up, I have some direction! Direction is what I have been waiting for, and God delivered just in the nick of time. :)

Wholly Yours

What is the opposite of writers block?
I'll describe it. It's when a person has far too much to say to put into coherent, easy to read words. It's to the point that one person should not be allowed to have that many thoughts floating around in their head. It's the concept that a person has been fighting whatever it is that needs sorting out but has only given up the fight recently.

Whenever God has something big to teach me, he graciously allows me to have time to fight back and not be taught. He stands on the sidelines waiting for me to listen to him. All the while, I struggle and sit and get frustrated. I choose to ignore the steady, calm, ever-present, unconditionally loving voice next to me asking for me to let him teach me. I've learned that it is a pattern for me.


The process has been taking place for a while now.
He's laid the foundation on so many occasions.
But it wasn't til I got here, to Northern Ireland, that I was ready to learn.
Then, even in the beginning of being here, I wouldn't hear of it.
I turned off my thoughts.
Just got frustrated.
And waited.
You know the end to this story, God wins.
God ALWAYS wins. 
And I am so glad he does.
I'm ready, Lord.
Fill me; teach me; move me; change me.
I am yours, wholly. 

Days

Each day brings new meaning.
Each day has it's own sunrise, sunset and high noon.
Each day is a gift from God.

The end of each day, for me, is a time to ponder the events of the day. The words said. The thoughts had, and the memories made. It is a time to reflect, to intercede and refocus.

I miss home. I've gotten to that point that I miss calling my mom everyday to talk about how my day went. I miss seeing my sister and brother and having witty banter with my dad. I miss going into work and seeing my pastors and fellow staff. I miss having my own car. I miss having a cell phone that I can use. I miss my mentor. I miss my friends. I miss home.

I was reading this book today about change. It talks about how change is inevitable. It happens all the time and you can always count on things changing. Whether it's the big things or the small things. For 2 1/2 more weeks, my world is changed. Then for a week and half after that...I'll be in the states but not home. Right now, change is temporary. I knew it was coming and it has been great. But as change comes, we cling to hold onto something that is constant. My constant is Jesus. He is all I need. He is who I turn to every night. Even when I am missing home, He is my strength.

Change is inevitable. 

What defines us is how we deal with the change. 

Will you run to Him?

24/7/365

Kristen's favorite little spot

Maybe that it's overcast.
Maybe it's that I just think too much.
Maybe it's cause God is doing a lot in me.

I think I'll go with the last reason. :)

The picture on your right is a little spot that Kristen pointed out to me right outside the Vineyard Centre. When you sit with your back against the tree, all you see is this. It's a vast field that's quite over grown.

The field is like the possibilities before me. I don't claim to be great at everything, but due to the opportunities God has blessed me with, I've done a number of different things. When I think about what is next, I often wonder what the next part of journey holds. Is it working with students? Is it getting a career job after I graduate? Is it randomly coming across a ton of money and not having to worry about money? I hope it is. But honestly, I have no clue. If you ask me what I'll be doing in three months, I will tell you that I don't know. And I can guarantee you that if you ask me in three months if I thought I'd be doing what I am doing, I'll tell you no. My dream and what God will do goes hand in hand. What is scary is the unknown.

Too often I see people choose to live safely because of their fear. What gets me is the people who think they have no fear...usually they have the most. I'll own up to it and tell you I have my own fears. But what I know is that God does not want us to live in fear. He says that perfect love casts out fear (1John 4:18).

The biggest thing I see God teaching me is how to live. Live with Him. The God of the Universe, who sent his son to die on the cross for MY sins and YOUR sins is right next to us. He is with us 24/7/365. That God that I serve is greater than anything else. When I fear, I tell him that He isn't enough. But more than that, I choose not to trust Him, I choose not to have faith that He is and always will be FAITHFUL.

THAT, my friends, is the challenge. Are you willing to die to yourself everyday and choose to trust? Trust God and let fear slip away. I will take up that challenge. And I pray that you will do the same. God is greater than we are. He is majestic and powerful. He is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. What do we have to fear? Nothing. :)

It is Good

See those two old ladies watching me? haha

Yesterday, we (Kristen, Cathy and I) went to the Titanic museum. I'm a little bit of a history buff and I loved it! Actually, at one point, I was going to get my degree in history. I just find the past fascinating. Anyways, the museum was awesome. I got to spend time with two lovely ladies and look at a world-renowned piece of history.

I also got to talk to my family on Skype yesterday as well as most of the people from work. It was so nice to see some friendly faces. :)

God has been teaching me so much while I'm here. It's mostly about myself. I find it particularly annoying, if I'm honest. All I wanted when I came here was God to give me direction for AFTER I graduated, not give me a life lesson on how I am. Not that I think I'm perfect, by any means. I know I am incredibly flawed, saved by grace and simply pursuing Christ. It's frustrating to have to learn all of these things that come to the surface when you have time. I have SO MUCH TIME. Compared to AZ, I'm just hanging out most of the time. This allows me to get more school work done in a timely manner, it allows me to rest, it gives me more time to hang out with Jesus and I get read a lot more. All of these things I love to do. It is just different. I'm okay with change, and things being different, but it takes me a while to adjust and adapt. That's my struggle over here. Don't get me wrong, I am doing things for the church and I'm seeing people. I'm doing a lot of walking and sightseeing. It's just different.

How do I tackle different? Jesus. Only way I have strength and courage to do it all. I miss being comfortable. Cause here, I am most definitely uncomfortable. I'm out of the comfort zone that I have been in. Which is good. It's right where I'm supposed to be. I know it. I wouldn't be here if God hadn't come through in the end with the last minute donations, and the money from the garage sale. I know it is God.

He's teaching me dependency. Dependency on him and him alone. I am a rather independent person. At least I think I am. I could be wrong. This trip, I depend on others for my transportation. Or I have to pay for it...on the train, or bus. (I love trains, like a LOT!) So it's not bad. And I depend on people for food, most of the time. I feel like God is showing me how to be dependent on Him, for everything. For what I say, what I do, how I talk, what I talk about, what I think about and how to love. It is almost like I'm starting completely over from scratch and figuring out newer, better ways to live with Jesus. In the end, that's good. And God is telling me the same thing. He's saying that this is good for me. So, I will be open to whatever more he has for me.

Be open to what God has for you. 

It may be unexpected and hard. 

But he says it is good.

Lessons Being Learned

If you know me at all, then you know that I don't slow down. Literally. Ever.
I'm pretty sure that resting and relaxing is one of those things that I just don't like doing. Well, that's not true. I really do like relaxing. I love lazy days, cause I don't have many of them. But more than those lazy days, I love meeting with my students. I love hanging out with my friends. Basically, I just love people. It's not of my own accord, it is all Jesus. Even still, I know that God has given me a heart for people.

I've been here in Northern Ireland since Friday. It's Tuesday now. I've lost track of the days so many times. Granted, I'm trying to get used to another time zone. I don't think I've gotten over the jet lag yet. I'll get there eventually.

I don't think I'm busy just for being the sake of busy. I feel like I'm busy because I'm doing things that I know I'm supposed to be doing for the Kingdom. It's Kingdom work. Maybe you think that is an excuse. Honestly, it doesn't really matter. I know what I do, and I try to remember to take breaks. I have great friends, family and a lovely mentor to remind me to take those lazy days I need.

This month is different.
This month, I'm away from almost everything that I know.
This month, I'm in a new place. With new people. And new rules.
This month, I am able to take time to rest. I'm able to relax. I'm able to have deep conversation and love on people.
This month...I'm learning how to live in a way that is different than I have lived.
God is showing up.
He is teaching me things that I wouldn't have been able to learn as well at home.
God is so majestic and all knowing.
The way he loves us is truly inspiring.
The way he sent his Son to the earth to die for our sins.
Our God is AWESOME.

Second Day

Welp, I am here in Northern Ireland. I was traveling for over 24 hours and in the same outfit for longer than that. It was so great. We got to the Vineyard Centre at 11am. Kristen and I got to hang out with some of the mom's at Parents and Toddlers then moved furniture for the brunch that we're having for church on Sunday. When I got to sleep, I slept for about 12 hours. I'm pretty sure that I'll get used to this time zone soon :)

God has been so good. If you've been following my trip, I posted about my First Fears the other day. It's been really kewl to see how God provides in the smallest of ways. Why, just this morning, I was sitting at Lurgan Park on a bench looking over the water. I loved getting to sit with Jesus and talk to him about my fears, excitements and joys. He just spoke to my heart on so many levels. This place is so wonderful; it's overcast, cold and green. I was watching the birds as I sat by the lake and I saw this one pigeon that was closer to me. He was puffing his feathers up and looking different than the rest of the pigeons. God just spoke to me in that moment. He told me that just like that bird, we as Christians are supposed to live that way. We are called to live in a way that people look at and question. Christ asks us to obey him with faith. I am so blessed to have a God that gives me the faith to obey him.

It's the little things in life that makes my walk with him exciting. This morning, Kristen and I couldn't remember how to get back to Cathy's house as we were walking and we asked God to show us the way. We were coming to a crossroads and we looked to the right and it was a cul-de-sac. Call me crazy, but to me, that was God. We knew which way to go. Sitting by the lake and getting to spend time with my King was just what I needed. I've tried to not expect anything on this trip. I want to be open to whatever God has for me. Each day so far has been just that. And it's only the second day. I see God shining in every moment with the people around me. Just the conversation that I've gotten to have with Kristen has been encouraging and uplifting. That is a beautiful display of God's graciousness.

First Fears

Tonight I had my first onslaught of fear.

All of a sudden, it just came upon me.

The question was..."What are you doing with your life? You left a perfectly fine life back in AZ. Things were going great. You have a job you love, people who care about you, a family who is AWESOME, and better friends than you ever imagined...so why are you going to Northern Ireland?"

I'm going because God told me to. I don't regret that decision for one second. No, sir.

When Jesus asked Simon to put his nets deep into the water, Simon didn't not respond with no. He said, "Master, we've worked hard all night and haven't caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets." (Luke 5:5)

That's what I'm doing. But the battle with Satan will be hard. The road is less traveled. The path is narrow. My God is with me.

Dreams?

Last night, at 10pm, when every other 22 year-old is just getting started with their night, mine was slowly winding down. My dad and I were driving back from dropping my sister off at the airport. She is off to NYC for a few days. As we sat, my dad looks at me and says, "Bre, what are some of your dreams?"

Man, I honestly can't remember the last time I was asked that question.

Needless to say, I stumbled over the answer. Granted, I was tired, but I had no idea what to say. What are my dreams?

This picture was taken over 2 years ago when I was campaigning for a great man I know in Georgia. He was running for Public Service Commissioner. Anyways, this is a picture one of my close friends, Grace and I jumping off of a ledge. We had worked hard all day long and this was a nice change of pace. We were just at a park hanging out and relaxing. The point is, in this picture, I was flying. Even if it was just for a few seconds. It's that out of body experience that is unexplainable and awesome, all at the same time.

Flying has always been one of my dreams.



 As I was pondering this question, which was constantly on my mind, I thought I'd go talk to my college pastor. We got to talking and he told me that he didn't know I was going to Northern Ireland. I see this particular pastor about 4 times a week, and I'm pretty sure I told him, but apparently he didn't know. So I told him that he should ask me about my life. And he said,

"I know what you want to do with your life. You want do something significant. You want to change the world." 

In just a few sentences, my problem was solved. My dreams weren't day to day, or month to month. My dream is to change the world. Do I do that in small ways every day? I try. My greatest dream of all is to change the world...not for myself, but for God. That is my dream. That is my goal. That is what I shall hold onto when I don't know what is left.

We are encouraged to dream when we are younger. We are told we can do anything. But as soon as we hit 16, the world tells us to stop dreaming and think about real life. My challenge to you is to keep dreaming. Do life, and live it well. But also dream. And don't give up on those dreams. God will give you the desires of your heart. He will help me change the world.

So, my friends, dream. Dream big. The God we serve is big. Nothing is impossible with God.